Helena Trent

In Darkness Born the Light - My Journey From Mutation To Transformation

The Healing Power of Mother Nature

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Today I felt good enough to go out for a walk. The fall is in full swing, leaves are changing colors and falling. I have always love this time of the year. 

As I walked through the fallen leaves and relaxed into nature, I felt the energy of the earth beneath my feet. I started thinking about the earth energy, it takes death and decay and transforms it into new life when the season turns. I, too, this fall/winter, like a tree, will let go of all that no longer serves me, preserve my core strength, allow the healing power of mother nature to give me new life again.

Keep On Keeping On

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I had my first appointment with my oncologist this afternoon since the hospital stay. They gave me a week off my Tagrisso to fully recover from all my nausea, diarrhea, lung congestion, etc. all the stuff I was dealing with during my hospital stay. They were concerned Tagrisso was adding to those side affects so they took me off it to be eliminate some variables. I had to confess I started back on Tagrisso as soon as I got home “against” doctor’s orders. I was feeling well enough and I wasn’t going to give cancer another week to work against me. I told him he was allowed to be mad at me, but he didn’t, he said he was happy I stayed on it. Whew! I am not in trouble… like  I am not already in enough trouble! lol!

He said the start of the treatments could be rough sometimes as we adjust to every individuals’ responses to medications, so I had a rough start especially with radiation. The treatment goal of reducing pain in my spine through radiation has been achieved. I am no longer in extreme back pain, so we agreed radiation is officially done.

Going forward, we will only do Tagrisso for the next couple of months to see if we could get to a stable period where the medicine can take effect. I will get blood tests every two weeks and stay on a good and easy routine. 

Tagrisso is the pill that blocks the gene mutation that produces cancer cells. During the hospital stay, with all the complications going on, they put me through several CT scans. Although they were not meant to measure the effectively of Tagrisso, the report did comment on slight shrinking of the tumor in my lungs and improvement on my nodules. Hopeful signs there.

My energy level has been up and down since my week long hospital stay. I am adjusting my activity levels as I can. Some days I am up, some days I am down. Generally speaking, I am getting better overall. I was able to do a slow set of tai chi here and there. It feels good to be able to get in touch with my body again through tai chi.

Conversations with Cancer

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Love

Cancer, if you want to dominate my life, then talk to me, teach me something for the time we have together. I am not your enemy. I am part of you, you are part of me for now. Why are you in my life?

To show you how much you are truly loved and deeply cared for by the world around you. Do you know how many people live through their lives not realizing that? Look at all the love and support pouring in since I showed up in your life. You have nothing to be afraid of, not life and not death. 
I am not here to kill you. I am here to show you a different way of living. No fighting, no struggling, just surrender to the flow of life and death. It's my job to guide you, but it's your job to live and appreciate life fully everyday. Everyday is a gift from life. Do something beautiful with it. This day is yours to live.

Thank you, Cancer, for the lesson. I understood. I appreciate you showed me the way. Thank you for being in my life to teach me this. Now that you’ve served your purpose. I now lovingly let you go in my body and in my soul. Good-bye, Cancer Cells!