Helena Trent

In Darkness Born the Light - My Journey From Mutation To Transformation

  • Contact Helena
  • Calligraphy Giveaway
  • My Chemo Routine

Archives for May 2019

PET Scan Results

May 24, 2019 by Helena Trent 1 Comment

As expected, the new spots on my liver are cancerous. I could have told him that 4 weeks ago, what else could it be at this point?!

Anyway, the waiting time gave me a chance to try out all these alternative treatments you all so generously helped me get. Although the results are not showing on the scan report yet, I think some great things are happening in my body, I could feel the difference, life coursing through my veins in every cell… maybe not all cells are on board just yet, lol, but they are turning around slowly but surely.

Meanwhile, when I told my oncologist all the alternative things I am doing, he dismissed them all as he was trained to do. I totally understand. In the last four weeks while I was determined to pursue alternatives that affirms my life energy, he is more determined to give me chemo treatments. The next step in the process is a liver biopsy which would determine if I have a different type of caner in my liver than in my lungs which is reasonable and I have agreed to do. When I asked for steps beyond that, chemo and radiation would likely be next on his agenda. I told him I will not do chemo and will not do radiation. Last time it almost killed me. He said if I don’t do something, I could be in trouble real soon. I told him if I did, then I will be trouble even sooner! He didn’t like that answer at all!! LOL!

Chemo to me is a last resort method which I will agree to if there comes a time that my physical conditions have deteriorated to a point that there is nothing to lose anymore, then that’s the time for drastic measures like chemo, but until then, it’s not my first choice or second or third… I am not going to choose to destroy my body out of fear. He is allowed to be as pissed off at me as he wants.

For the first time in my life (and yes, perhaps the last time in my life), I am willing to trust how I feel and that I am truly ok despite outside circumstances. Life is on my side. When I tune into my breath, it doesn’t feel fear, it just does its thing, breath in and breath out, calm and strong… as if to say, I am here, you are ok.

Filed Under: Medical Update

Healing Crisis

May 21, 2019 by Helena Trent 2 Comments

Tomorrow I will get my PET scan results. Good news? Bad news? Honestly it will not affect how I live and how I feel about life anymore.

The Chinese characters for crisis keep coming to me recently. The word has two characters in it. The character on the left means “danger”, the character on the right means “opportunity”.

What if the worst things that ever happened to me were the greatest opportunities I have ever been given???

This healing crisis has taught me so much about life, love, and just being human. It has expanded my life in ways I could not have imagined. I could not have been more grateful for the journey I have been led on (ok, forced into, lol!!!). If we had a choice, no one in their sane mind would choose this journey, yet, it is precisely healing crisis like this (or any other kind of crisis) that taught me there is a deeper truth to life than the ups and downs of circumstances we face. Life has a way of connecting us to our highest truth and deepest strength. I am given this opportunity precisely because I have the strength, the maturity, and the resources to heal.

What I saw as dark mountains to climb before are now bridges under a sunny sky. There is a reason I live in the city of bridges!!! Pittsburgh has the most bridges of any cities in the world! I am in the right place at the right time as my journey unfolds before me.

Filed Under: Inspiration

PET Scan Meditation

May 16, 2019 by Helena Trent 1 Comment

I had a PET scan this morning and had the craziest meditation experience I thought I would share with everyone.

For those of you that had ever been sick (hopefully not as sick as I am), medical screenings are never fun. People usually show up so stressed out and in a lousy mood understandably so. Me being me, I had the most enlightening experience! LOL!!!

Here is what happened…

As part of the protocol, they told me to fast this morning, no food, no drinks, no caffeine, no exercise… basically be as quiet as possible so that they can get a read on my cancer cell activities. They injected me with the contrast and told me to sit quietly for an hour. I thought to myself, that I can do! So, I sat quietly and relaxed. Before I knew it, I went into a deep meditation…

I have done meditation plenty of times before, but this was different. First of all, I didn’t set out to do it. I simply sat and it felt so good and natural that my body went completely still. I didn’t feel the need to stir so I let my body be. After a while, it felt like I was floating in vastness of nothing, like being in space not that I ever knew what space is like. 🙂 I went into this deep trance, no thought, no emotions, no nothing… just be. By the time the hour was over and the nurse came to get me, it felt like moments went by. I was completely dazed.

I walked over to the scan room and lied down on the scan table, decided to go quiet again and it happened again. I was completely still for however much time it took them (maybe 30-45 min) and again it felt like minutes. I have been in a couple dozen scans for this or that in the last 6 months, I had always had to try to stay still for all that time, but not this time! By the time they told me it was over, I couldn’t believe it. The nurse had to tell me twice before I recognized what he was saying!

I was so amazed that I drove home and decided to sit for no reason other than total curiosity. I sat for another 2 hours being totally absolutely still with no effort! The only reason I got out of it was my son texted me because he forgot something.

Ahh… time to come back to the real world! lol! Thank you, life! What an amazing day! And, thank you, Cancer, for teaching me how to meditate!

Filed Under: Inspiration

  • « Previous Page
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • Next Page »

Recent Posts

  • Thank You All
  • In Honor of Helena
  • The Time Has Come…
  • Journey’s End
  • New Toys

Recent Comments

  • Sudesh on Journey’s End
  • Huiling Song on Journey’s End
  • Rita on Journey’s End
  • Mary Ellen Turner on Journey’s End
  • Sandy on Journey’s End

Archives

  • September 2021
  • July 2021
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2016

Categories

  • Conversations with Cancer
  • Family
  • Inspiration
  • Medical Appointments
  • Medical Update
  • Progress update
  • Wisdom Characters
This website uses cookies to improve your experience. We'll assume you're ok with this, but you can opt-out if you wish.AcceptReject Read More
Privacy & Cookies Policy

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.
Non-necessary
Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.
SAVE & ACCEPT